I did it! Step one completed.

I just finished my first assignment for my university course, with three days to spare.. and I'm feeling relatively happy about it!

I haven't written an essay in over three years. I'd been struggling over this one for weeks. It wasn't particularly hard, just hard to start. In the end, I had to write most of it in my head like I'd normally do with a blog post and then type a chunk of it out at a time. Then it got rewritten and reworked and here we are most of the day later and I have a measly 800 word essay. I'm still proud of it, and myself. I did it. That's the first step finished.

Musical Fun

Kate had a fun game on her blog yesterday, in which you make your band's album cover!

I couldn't be more in love with my result than I already am. Here's how you play along...

1. Go to wikipedia. Hit 'random'
or click: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is your band name.

2. Go to Quotations Page and select 'Random Quotations'
or click: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very last quote on the page is the title of your album.

3. Go to Flickr and click on 'explore the last seven days'
or click: http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days

4. Use Photoshop (or something like picnik.com) to put it all together.

And what I came up with...


That really looks like a real album cover. You'd buy my album, right? I was thinking the other day, what was the first CD I bought for myself? I couldn't remember for the longest time and then it came to me. Someone had given me money, possibly for a birthday and I went to the mall and bought two CDs at once. I must have been 12 because both albums came out in 1994. I remember my dad being skeptical as I said I wanted these two. He said 'you're sure, these two?' and I had to defend my choices.

Boyz II Men's album II and All-4-One's self-titled album.




My album cover totally looks better than these two. Oh god, I remember sitting at home and taping 'I Swear' and 'I'll Make Love To You' off the radio whenever the songs came on and swooning. I've always been a little overemotional. Take a walk down memory lane with me...





So, spill it.

What was the first CD you bought? Or tape or record, for you oldies out there.

One from my honeymoon...

N and I were married many years ago. When I moved to this country, the restrictions of my visa were that we were to marry within 6 months. I wasn't able to work during that time and I wasn't able to leave the country for a further year.

It was a bit of a struggle planning the wedding from a different country and things were mostly left to N to sort out as there just wasn't time as it was just over three months between me flying into England and us getting married. So N hired the reception hall, booked the church and took care of the food. I did bridesmaid dresses and flowers when I arrived. We did manage the photographer and the videographer together. And then there was the honeymoon.

I did dream of Europe or somewhere farther afield for our honeymoon. But it wasn't to be. We were stuck in this country. We decided on the Moray Firth region of Scotland to honeymoon. It was the stories of bottlenose dolphins that brought us up there. Excited, we booked a country cottage named 'Dolphin Lodge.'

But of course, we married in December and it was too cold for dolphin sightings. So disappointing! We had fun anyway, taking long road trips into the middle of nowhere, stopping off at roadside shops to pick up quirky little things we wouldn't find anywhere else, enjoying other ..ahem, honeymoon activities. There was a farm near where we stayed and I remembered there were two ponies that had a little horse 'fight' when we drove by and we stopped to watch as they reared up at each other. I have great memories of our Scottish holiday. Wouldn't change it for anything.

Where do you go or where would you like to go on your honeymoon?

Money-saving Tips

I wrote this awhile back. I didn't post it because I didn't think that I'd hit on anything particularly new or different, but I figure I'd spent all that time writing this, that I'd post it anyway.

Times are tough. I thought I'd share some of the money-saving tips that have helped our household or that I've come across recently. Everyone knows you should turn your heating down by one degree, use energy efficient lightbulbs or turn electrical appliances off at the switch rather than leaving them on standby but here are some other ideas. You may have heard them all before and have some of your own? Let me know.

Websites: The cashback website that we use (and by that, I mean N uses) is Quidco. Every time you shop online or change gas/electricity or sign up for a new credit card you either get a fixed amount of cash back of a percentage of what you buy. We've saved at least 800 pounds since using it.

MySupermarket.co.uk compares prices and offers from the major supermarkets, and petrolprices.com will tell you cheapest petrol stations if you register. Use loyalty cards.

The only paid surveys I use is Yougov. It pays 50p per survey completed and won't pay out until you reach 50 pounds. It takes awhile to get to that first amount of money unless you refer other people. I've asked before, but help me out and sign up using this link.

Moneysavingexpert.com is a good resource for other money saving tips. Everytime I look at the site however, I'm bowled over by the amount of information on display and have no idea where to start. Good luck.

Plan ahead: Do a weekly food menu and shop once. Stick to a budget. Buy online and pay the delivery costs if the offers in store are too much of a temptation. Plan for certain weeks in which you eat food out of your cupboards. Pastas, rice dishes, baked beans on toast. All healthy meals and cheap as well. Try cutting meat out of your diet once or twice a week. Buy store-branded or value products, but don't skimp on quality. We found the value baked beans to be utter crap and not worth the extra savings. Cook food from scratch and don't waste money on ready-made food. Homemade food will be tastier, healthier and cheaper. Curries or stews make great leftovers as well for lunches later on in the week.

Plan ahead for other things. Write on your calendar when your car MOT or insurance is coming up and set aside money for them so it isn't such a huge surprise when the time rolls around or try to work it so that not more than one huge bill happens every month.

Buy greetings cards in advance as well as children's birthday party presents. I have a list of all the names of the children whose birthday parties I think Elliot will be invited to in the year and have set aside a 'birthday party shelf' of toys that I've bought in the sales. I've also bought a few extra just in case. Same goes for Christmas cards/wrapping paper and birthday/Christmas presents for my boys.

Buy and Sell: There are plenty of ways in which you can get rid of unwanted items around the house and boost your income. Selling via ebay, netmums.com, NCT nearly-new sales. We've gotten rid of a ton of old baby things lately and putting more on ebay this week: a moses basket, a double pushchair, an old wardrobe, toys. Go room by room and I'm sure you'll find some old things to sell. Goes without saying that buying from these websites is also a great way to save money.

For me, one of the hardest problems was buying books. I was addicted for a long time. It was my comfort buy. But now I'm putting my library card to good use as well as a book swapping websites. (I use readitswapit.co.uk)

There are loads of cheap things to do to keep the kids entertained, but I think that's one for another post. What things do you to save costs?

Meet My Dad

My father was born in 1947 in Eugene, Oregon but the family soon moved around northern California and finally settled in a little town called Benicia. His father worked in contruction and his mom was one of those perfect 50s mom that you hear so much about. She was famous for her cooking and baking, she grew her own fruit and vegetables. As much as he was a boy's boy, he was also a big time Mama's boy as well. He had two older brothers and a younger sister, who nicknamed him 'DD'.

He had one of those childhoods that reminds me of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn and he took inspiration from both, sailing down rivers into places he shouldn't go. He ran wild and had adventures. He got into trouble and used up so much energy that he never went to bed but passed out at night mid-activity.



He was loved by teachers and students alike. Smart but a class clown, and at an early age started tutoring younger students and those less capable in maths. He joined the swim team to enormous success. Competitive swimming became a huge part of his life as he won trophies and medals. He worked hard and long to be the best. There was talk of him trying out for the Olympic swim team but an accident beforehand prevented this from happening. (He jumped into what turned out to be an empty swimming pool trying to impress a girl and broke his kneecap.)



Despite having a full-ride sports scholarship to Indiana University, instead, he enlisted in the army. He spent three tours in Vietnam. He could have come home earlier than he did, but he stayed. He was shot down from his helicopter three times. The third time, a bullet went through his calf, all the way up his body. It hit his spinal chord. He had to relearn how to walk and speak and spent a great deal of time in physical therapy.



After the time spent in hospital, he travelled, lost himself. Stories from this period of his life include drugs, alcohol and even the Hell's Angels. More trouble. He spent a great deal of time by himself, trying to recapture something good in himself after the horrors that he witnessed and participated in during Vietnam. To this day, he's still plagued by nightmares, still suffers the affects of the war. He's 33 when he meets my mother. He's living in Seattle, a caretaker for the apartment building she lives in. He falls in love ... with David, my mother's 5 month old son. He'd do anything for this chubby little boy. Two years later, I arrive.



We lived in seclusion in Alaska for 7 years, before my dad felt comfortable living near other people. We moved to Oregon, got our first dog. He stayed at home and looked after us. He was there when we had the chicken pox and poison oak. It was him that fostered my love of reading, encouraged my brother to try out for sports. My dad volunteered as a maths tutor when I was in middle school. He has a great ability to get boys to understand algebra by using sports analogies. He became very active in the wrestling team and became a sort of mentor to most of the team.

Of course there were problems. His relationship with my mother, the divorce, his pent-up anger which stem from his war experiences. He made some bad decisions, but through it all, I've always know that he's loved my brother and me. He was a single father for so long. Drove us to sports practices, took us on holidays. Supported my decision to marry at such an early age and move across the country. He gave me away on my wedding day.

He's led a very interesting life, I'd love to write his biography one day. I bet I wouldn't be able to capture him at all. He has such a loud voice, a personality that people are drawn to. Children everywhere flock to him. He is generous to a fault and gives away most of his possesions every time he moves. The first time he came to visit, he managed to transform a group of strangers on the tube from being stony-faced and unable to look anyone in the eye to laughing and discussing the differences between England and America.

He is a devoted grandparent. He can't see enough pictures of the two boys, he loves every story I tell him about what they're up to. He calls Elliot 'Buddy' and Elliot calls him 'Baba'. The point of my story is this: this time next week, my dad will be here for a three week visit. I am very excited.

A Sunday Salon on a Monday..

I was ill all weekend. That horrible sore throat plus body aches and fever thing that's been going around. Plenty of sleep seemed to be all I needed, so I slept most of Sunday (hence no Salon on Sunday!). The thing about napping all day means that I didn't get to sleep until about 1:30 this morning. With two small children to look after, I feel like today is going to be painful.

This week I finished three books. The War Poems by Wilfred Owen, which I could only dip into here and there and couldn't read for long anyway. Very powerful and beautiful and sad. And my sleepless night allowed me to finish Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt in one sitting. I wish I'd read that book when I was younger. It was such a magical little book. It made me think of all the other books that I did when I was a little girl and look for such a list coming up soon.

But most of the week was spent with Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier. Since Regeneration, I've been on this war kick. It's not something I was particularly interested in before, the effects of war on soldiers, families, relationships. But now I find I'm drawn to it. I wonder if it's just a phase or if it's my brain trying to understand the decisions and motivations of those close to me that have been involved in war. I'm not sure. Until I figure it out, I think I'm going to continue with this war-phase as much as I'm able to.

A poll...

I Feel Incredibly Lucky

..That they're both so happy and healthy. That's they're sweet boys, if a little mischievious. That they get on so well with each other. That they're so bloody GORGEOUS. That they're mine.

Read Aloud Thursday

Read Aloud Thursday is something I've been meaning to participate in for weeks. I keep leaving the titles of the books we've read aloud in the comments over at Hope Is the Word. This week, no excuses. Here's what we've been reading this week.

Elliot's bedtime routine includes reading four books. This number is flexible but it never goes below four. Last week it was all about the free Thomas the Tank Engine books that came free with the (terrible) paper, but we've been trying to wean him off them.



Dinosaurs Love Underpants by Claire Freedman and Ben Cort. Elliot went through a phase of liking dinosaurs. Now he thinks they're scary and says 'I don't like die-shoe-aurs' but this book makes him giggle instead of be afraid, so it's still allowed. This book explains the mystery of how the dinosaurs became instinct. Elliot likes the illustrations as well as the rhyming text.


All Afloat on Noah's Boat by Tony Mitton and Guy Parker-Rees. On Noah's ark, the animals are all getting a little testy and impatient with one another, so Noah decides to put on a talent-show, but one pair of animals is feeling a little left out...



No More Eee-orrh! by Lydia Monks. This is possibly my favourite picture book of Elliot's. I'm a fan of donkeys anyway, but in this Lydia Monks has taken real photos of donkey fur (fur?) and used it alongside cartoon illustrations in this tale (tail!) about a noisy donkey and his neighbours.




Tiddler by Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler. Who doesn't love Julia Donaldson? Elliot adores all of her stories. Especially when she teams up with Axel Scheffler. His favourite part of Tiddler? Pointing out the 'Gruffalo fish' and yelling 'Tiddler? Tiddler? Tiddler's LATE!' The rhyming repitition of this book which makes it all a bit sing-songy really appeals to my three year old.

WW: Donkey!

(This was from a birthday-past. Any guesses as to which was being celebrated?)

Library Loot

1. Casino Royale by Ian Fleming
2. The Lives of Animals by JM Coetzee
3. Hello? Is Anybody There? by Jostein Gaarder
4. Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt
5. Zorro by Isabel Allende
6. Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier
7. American Gods by Neil Gaiman
8. The War Poems by Wilfred Owen
9. Absolute Trust in the Goodness of the Earth by Alice Walker

I always have an idea of what I'd like to pick up from the library before I go, I try to make it reasonable. Today, I wanted poetry from WWI, I was *hoping* for Tipping the Velvet by Sarah Waters, something by Dorothy Koomson (I saw Marshmallows for Breakfast the last time I was in) and some good YA. As you can see, I didn't have much luck. Apart from the poetry. To make it worse, I wanted to stop by a new library this week to see some different books, but it turns out the only one I would be able to drive to was closed until tomorrow at 2pm. I hate things like that. Not that they were closed, that's understandable. I hate it when I have an idea in my head how things will turn out and things end up completely different. Like not finding the right books, to going to my normal library.

I picked Casino Royale because it's on the 1001 list. I thought the Coetzee was as well, but it isn't. I saw it just as I was heading out and didn't stop the check my list, that I nerd-ily keep in my handbag at all times. I picked up the Gaarder book and Tuck Everlasting in order to balance out the adult fiction. I'm excited about American Gods. I adore Alice Walker and Isabel Allende. I'm not sure why I picked up Cold Mountain. It's the movie tie-in version and I normally avoid those editions, but I didn't today.

REVIEW: What I Loved by Siri Hustvedt

I'm having a difficult time reviewing this book because I feel that in no way will I do this beautifully written novel justice. What I Loved is told through the point of view of Leo, an art historian who befriends an artist, Bill in 1970s New York, and the relationships that Leo and Bill form over the span of 25 years with each other, their wives, their two boys. As tragedy strikes, the tone of the novels switches from that of a chronicle of relationships to a creepy psychological thriller.

I found Hustvedt's writing style to be very similar in tone and the themes covered to her husband, Paul Auster: love, loss, identity, which added to my enjoyment of the novel. I thought that the four adults, Leo and Erica and Bill and Violet were utterly fascinating, cultured people and I wanted in on their inner circle as they discussed modern art, art history, literature, Violet's medical research. I loved the detail in which Bill's artwork is discussed and how it progresses throughout the novel, especially his fairy tale phase. Violet's research though is what stole the show for me. Eating disorders, hysteria, the decline of popular culture. I hung mesmerised by everything that Violet said or did.

I thought the second half of the novel was very subtle and disturbing. This slow feeling of creepiness and foreboding of what happens next left me unable to put this book down. Everything in this book felt authentic, real. I felt like I knew the characters in this book, I could relate to them, and as each event takes places I felt myself reeling by each loss, each betrayal. I will certainly be reading Hustvedt's other novels.

Elliot's haircut

Before...



...And after.





It's a major change. I'm already regretting it. His wild hair always just seemed to accentuate Elliot's fun personality. When N came home he said he was sad that Elliot's curls are gone. My mother-in-law seems heartbroken. It had to be done. Please tell me that those beautiful curls will grow back.

Sunday Salon (15 February)

When I was in middle school, I read Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank and it inspired me to read more about World War II. I devoured any autobiography or diary I could get my hands on. This week, I had a similar experience.

I spent most of this week reading Regeneration by Pat Barker. Whilst reading it, I realised I know very little about World War I. I know the broad, over-all details, but I never really read any personal stories or anyone's actual accounts as they experienced WWI. And I'd like to. Probbly starting with WWI poetry. I'd heard of Anthem For A Doomed Youth, but I'd never read it until after I finished Regeneration. Both the poem and Regeneration are very powerful and I will certainly look out for more.

Suggestions? Have you been inspired to read more about a certain event in history after reading a fictional account?

Wilfred Owen's biography
Siegfried Sassoon's biography
Wikipedia listing for World War I
Poems by Wilfred Owen

What passing-bells for these who die as cattle?
Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries now for them; no prayers nor bells;
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,-
The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.

What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of boys but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of good-byes.
The pallor of girls' brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.

How addicted to blogging are you?

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Random Thoughts

I can't bring myself to write a whole post on anything, so here's what's going on, bullet-style.

-I started both Prom by Laurie Halse Anderson and Surfacing by Margaret Atwood this week but wasn't able to get more than 20 pages in before giving up. I'm now reading Regeneration by Pat Barker and enjoying it. I might finish it this afternoon.

-There are a higher number of book reviews on my blog these days, but only because I'm going through a phase of reading more 1001 books. Once the phase has ended, the reviews will also stop. Just so you know. Look for a review of What I Loved soon.

-I'm going to stop doing my closer looks at my Robert Sabuda books. It didn't generate very much interest after the first week. Too much hassle to continue.

-In running news, I'm up to about 5k 3-4 days a week. I know that I'm not pushing myself very hard because at the end, I'm only at about a 3 on Christie's f*ck me scale.

-I'm finding the best songs to run to, that motivate me to continue running are songs by Eminem. They've got good beats and I find the angriness of it all to be just what I need to keep going. My 'power-song' is Womanizer by Britney Spears, however.

-Maybe next week I'll post photos of Elliot's first 'proper' haircut. When we're at toddler group or I'm picking him up from pre-school, and he's surrounded by a bunch of other children, I can't immediately recognise him. I'm so used to looking for a big mop of curls.

-I recieved three parcels this week. Two very exciting. More later on that.

-A special visitor will be arriving in a few weeks. I'm a little worried but also very excited.

-I've been taking quite a few naps this last week. I rarely take naps these days so this is surprising.

Brought to you by the letter L

This letter meme has been making the rounds, 10 things you love starting with a particular letter. Chris from book-a-rama was nice enough to send me the letter L. Anyone else want to play along and I'll give you a letter to do on your own blog. Or leave your list in the comments!

Love - Especially with Valentine's Day so near it's good to be appreciative of the love. N and I are going out to a Thai restaurant for dinner. No presents this year. What's everyone else doing?

Laughter - My favourite sound in the whole world is when Elliot starts laughing and then Joshua starts laughing with him and they keep feeding off each other's laughter, so much that *I* start laughing. They're usually laughing at me though.

Lists - Oh, lists of any kind. To-do lists, books read, books wanted, books checked out of the library. Lists, lists, lists. How would I manage without them?

London - what's that quote? If you're bored in London, you're bored with life? We went to London last weekend to meet up with some friends. And we did it with no kids! First time in awhile. I had a great time. I still love being a tourist in London.

Libraries - I can now drive to my local library. I go there once a week at least. Libraries have always been my special place. I used to have panic attacks in America because of changes in my life. I'd start hyperventilating and be panicky and I used to run to the nearest library so I could breathe again. LOVE libraries.

Letters - I love getting hand-written letters. I was going to use this space to suggest the idea of pen-pals. I've seen it done on other blogs I read and I think it's a fantastic idea. But when I thought about it more, I thought I'm hardly keeping up with the friends I have even with email and facebook and this blog. I think if I started a pen-pal thing I'd fail miserably. And that's not fair on anyone. It's a nice idea though, and maybe when I'm blessed with more organisational skills..

Lie-ins - At this point, lie-ins seems like a myth. But it can't be, surely. I'll get out of bed past 7:30 one day. When I'm retired maybe. Elliot's been having nightmares lately, so he wakes up either really early or through the night. And then comes in our bed :(

Legoland - It's coming up to Legoland reopening. Elliot's favourite place on earth. I love to see the excitement in his eyes. He's talked about Legoland all through the winter and he knows that it opens again in March, after Joshua's birthday. We'll be there.

Little children - OK, I really meant MY little children. But I have nothing more to say about them just now.

Lots of comments - So I struggled with 10 L words! But lots of comments is always nice!

Other L words that didn't make the cut? Lazy Sundays, Lemonade, Long-sleeves, Labradors, Long, hot showers, Literary Couples, Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!, Lightning, Left-handed men.

WW: This is a blank post. Do not pay attention...

REVIEW: The New York Trilogy by Paul Auster

Three postmodern, dream-like tales of urban paranoia on the subject of the nature of identity. In the first a crime writer is drawn into a mysterious investigation; in the second a man spies on someone from an apartment; and in the third the childhood friend of a disappeared man is made his literary executor. Auster's prose glitters and beguiles, but does not offer anything as mundane as objective truth.

I'm sure it comes as no surprise by now that I love Paul Auster. This is one of those books that have stayed with me long after I've finished reading its last page. I'm left with a lot of questions and uncertainties. I'm left feeling completely perplexed and unsure of what I've just read but I find that the journey to that point is something I can't give up.

Initially, I was a little put off at the fact that the three books in this trilogy (City of Glass, Ghosts, and Locked Room) are detective stories but of course, it being Auster, they aren't typical detective stories. He turns the classic detective story and spins it so that this is a study of identity. Both of the characters in the books, the relationship between reader and author, the pursued and the pursuer.

The subtlety of the writing, the depth of themes and the way in which each story is connected, the darkness of the subject matter, the books within the books. The combination of all these continue to make Paul Auster my favourite author ever. You haven't read anything by Paul Auster then you are sorely missing out.

Blog awards

Becca of I'm Me, What More Do You Want? awarded me this Honest Scrap award as well as the Lemonade Award. To accept the Honest Scrap award, I must list 10 honest things about me, but I think my 25 Things earlier in the month sums up just about everything.





Emmie of Emma's Dilemmas and Great Expectations gave me this very pretty blog love award.



No tagging today. If you're reading this, feel free to accept your awards!

Interview Questions

Florinda over at 3 R's (one of my favourite bloggers, go check her out if you haven't already) sent me these interview questions. I had a lot of fun answering them! If you want to play along as well, see the rules at the bottom!

What hobby or pastime that you don't seem to have time for anymore would you like to start up again?

I've been thinking about this a bit lately. Especially after a Weekly Geeks task (which I lurk around at but haven't participated in for awhile) was blogging about other hobbies/interests outside of books and blogging. I feel like I need to branch out a bit, but now isn't the right time. With the studying and looking after my children I don't really have the time. But that isn't the question. If I DID have the time what would I like to start up again. Hmm, implies I had some hobby before.

I guess writing would be one. In high school I kept writing stories that I hoped would eventually be published. I haven't written anything in awhile but it certainly would be something I'd like to continue with eventually. I love to take photos but I know I'm not very good at it. I'd love to take a class. If I wasn't starting my psychology degree, I think I'd study for a Modern Languages degree, the focus being on Spanish and English. The OU does this programme and everytime I look at it I think, I'd like to do that. I wish I had more time to read. I wish I had more time to focus on my running and branch out to different sports. I used to be on a swimming team (swimming is in my genes, remind me and I'll tell you about it sometime) and would love to swim again. I'd love to spend more time baking. I so want to be that mom who bakes lovely smelling things and my kids will think back fondly of their mom's baking.

When I thought about it more, it turns out I do have hobbies and interests outside of books and blogging!

If you could only have ONE of the following: music, TV, books, or internet - which would it be, and why?

This one seemed harder than it is, really. Immediately, I would drop both TV and music. I like them both, but they're the two, for me, that are more easily expendable. Then the logical part of my brain thought maybe I'd choose the Internet and that way I could still access TV programmes, books music and still blog and email. But I just couldn't do it. I love my books too much. I like the feeling of reading actual books, turning the pages, curled up somewhere comfortable. I could never give up my books. It'd be hard for me to give up blogging but what can I do?

What's on the menu for your last meal? (The foods can come from anywhere - six different restaurants, your late grandma's kitchen, a taco truck, etc.)

Food. I don't like food that much. I'm always a bit 'meh' when it comes to good food. Give me a delicious slice of cake or some other dessert and I'll be impressed.

Last meal. My all-time favourite meal came from this Indian restaurant that was just around the corner from where we used to live in Hounslow. We went there all the time. I'd always get the same meal. Lamb kofta kebab for starters, a chicken and pineapple curry similar to a chicken korma, very creamy (I can't for the life of me remember what this dish was called!) aloo gobi and a garlic naan. I love Indian food. I'm not a big fan of spicy so wherever we go I always end up with a very mild chicken dish. Our current Indian takeaway does this nice chicken curry with nuts (why can I not find the menu anywhere?!) If I were to choose a meal, I'd probably go with this one. Maybe I'd choose saag aloo instead of the gobi aloo, but the rest stays the same. Don't get me started on desserts. We'd be here all day and wouldn't get anywhere.

What does the title of your blog mean?

You know, I wish the answer to this question was more interesting, but it's not. I had a different blog title when I started, but then I was blog-hopping and someone (not someone whose blog I normally read) mentioned visiting a butterfly house. It got me to thinking that my favourite place in all of England was this butterfly house that was near where I used to live. (The Butterfly House in Syon Park, Isleworth which has since shut down as far as I know) On a whim, I changed my blog title to 'Fluttering Butterflies' because I liked the visual it produced. Then someone lovely came along and cemented the title by designing this butterfly background and header for me for free!

What is your most surprising talent or interest - the one that makes people say "I didn't know you (did/liked/knew)..."?

I don't really know how to answer this one. I guess it would probably be that I cook. All the time and it's not terrible. I cook a lot of things from scratch. That might be surprising because a) I don't like food much and b) N is a much better cook. To be honest, if he's in the house, I sometimes don't even consider cooking dinner. I just figure he'll do it. My mother in law says all the time how impressed she is that I've come so far in my cooking abilities. She likes my food most of the time and she's quite the picky eater so I think that that's saying something.

But Joshua's food (and before Elliot was a year old) is my territory. I didn't like the idea of giving my children baby food from those awful little jars so I've made all my own purees and other baby foods. I love knowing exactly what my kids are eating. I spend a lot of time with it. I try to make different things every week. I feel on top of the world when the kids like what I've made. When Joshua pulls faces like he doesn't like what I've made him, I'm heartbroken.

Feel like playing along?

Leave me a comment saying, "Interview Me." Please include your e-mail address if it is not in your profile.

I will respond by emailing you five questions. (I get to pick the questions.)

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REVIEW: Fingersmith by Sarah Waters

“My name, in those days, was Susan Trinder. People called me Sue. I know the year I was born in, but for many years I did not know the date, and took my birthday at Christmas. I believe I am an orphan.”

This first sentence pulled me straight into this beautifully crafted novel by Sarah Waters. This is only my second novel of Waters that I've read and already she's becoming one of my favourite authors. Fingersmith is such a wonderful novel, with with fun characters, a complex and twisted plot, and her writing style is so rich and full of detail.

Sue is an orphan living in Victorian London in a houseful of thieves and petty criminals. After Sue's mother was hanged for murder, Sue has been raised and protected by Mrs Sucksby, a woman who takes in unwanted babies and sells them on. I adored the various characters in this London house. There's Mr Ibbs who buys stolen goods and then melts down the silver and gold. There's John Vroom who steals dogs and has his girlfriend Dainty sew the dog skins together into a coat a la Cruella de Vil. And then there's the well-known conman, Gentlemen, who comes to Lant Street with a proposal.

He has heard of a rich young woman, Miss Lilly, in an isolated estate in the country who can only come into her fortune by marrying. He wants to Sue to become her maid and nudge her into marrying Gentleman so that they can take her money and place Miss Lilly into a mental asylum. Sue agrees and off he go on a wonderfully twisty, turny storyline.

As I've said, I love the characters, not just the poor criminals, but Miss Lilly, her mad old uncle, Gentleman. Sarah Waters paints each setting, both in London and out in the country with such vivid detail that I could picture myself alongside Sue picking locks and feel the isolation of Maud Lilly. Sarah Waters wrote these characters so well and so convincingly, that even whilst the villains did horrible things, and the other characters make surprising choices, I still felt sympathetic towards them. I liked Sue and Maud's unlikely friendship slowly that slowly built over the course of the novel, their guilt and helplessness of both of their situations.

Until the very last page of this 500+ book, I was hooked. It took me three days to read this and I hated it everytime I had to put it down and carry on with my day-to-day activities. I wish I was the type of person who wrote down memorable passages of a book to share with you, but I don't. You just have to take my word that this is a wonderful read. Highly recommended.

On music that brings back memories...

I walked in the door the other day, having just dropped Elliot off at pre-school to the sound of the radio. In my mad rush to get out the door, I'd forgotten to switch it off. The song playing was 'What's Love Got To Do With It' by Tina Turner. That song for me is one that brings back an intense feeling.

I'm not so great with actual memories. Sounds and smells and all of that bring back feelings for me rather than a specific memory of actual events, and What's Love Got To Do With It reminds me of my mother, and in a good way. I can picture us laughing and dancing in the kitchen to this song. I'm not sure if we ever did laugh and dance to this song, but I like to think so. Maybe my mom just always turned up the radio when this song was playing. Either way, it reminds me of being happy as a child.

It reminds me of a time when I was maybe 6 or 7. During the summer my brother and I would run off and collect wild blackberries and my mom would bake them into a pie for us. It was back when we still did things together as a family and ate dinner at the dining table. My mom would make us dinners of lasagna with spinach or whole stuffed fish with the heads still attached and I'd complain about the bones in the fish or how the spinach ruined the taste of the lasagna.

On the weekends, she'd take me and my brother to a rec center nearby and we'd do Native American arts and crafts. She'd make these pretty little triangle-beaded earrings and let me choose the colours and she was trying to show me how to loom myself a belt and take me to Pow-wows and I always had elephant ears and loved to listen to the drumming and watch the dancers.

I think back on it now and I'm amazed at my mother. When I was 6 or 7, she was the same age that I am now. How would I have coped with a 7 year old and a 9 year old, in a loveless relationship away from any friends or family? She was so young to have so much going on. I see her in a different light now that I have children of my own. That different perspective makes things a little better and a little worse all at the same time. But I can respect that things were hard for her.

It's so easy now, after everything that has happened between us, to look back and only remember the bad times, the nasty things we said to each other, the things that we did. But there were good times as well. And I need to hold on to the good times more than anything.

Everytime I hear this song, everytime Tina Turner belts out in her amazing voice the chorus to this song, I think of happy times.

What songs do you attach particular feelings or memories to?

Library Loot 4

1. The Regeneration Trilogy by Pat Barker
2. The Midwich Cuckoos by John Wyndham
3. M Is For Magic by Neil Gaiman
4. The Chocolate Run by Dorothy Koomson
5. Prom by Laurie Halse Anderson
6. Surfacing by Margaret Atwood

Plus three Thomas the Tank Engine books and one Postman Pat book for Elliot. I still have out Saffy's Angel by Hilary McKay and What I Loved by Siri Hustvedt (which is what I'm currently reading)(Did you know that Siri Hustvedt and Paul Auster are married? I didn't until yesterday.)

I almost picked up Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood and Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell, but I didn't. They are both books I'd like to read and that I think I'd enjoy reading. The problem is that I own both of those books and I'm really likely to put off reading them forever because I know that they will always be there but that I have to return library books by a certain date. Maybe in a more desperate situation I'll resort to checking those books out.

I was hoping for a better selection of children's books. I really need them as a buffer between the serious books. That's why I went back for the Dorothy Koomson book. I'd read My Best Friend's Girl last year and really enjoyed it. And I was very excited with the Neil Gaiman.

(Incidentally, What I Loved, The Regeneration Trilogy, Surfacing, The Midwich Cuckoos, The Blind Assassin and Cloud Atlas are all on the 1001 Books To Read Before You Die, which I've taken up again. I'm feeling a little competitive and want to boost up my numbers. (Currently 114/1001) Ms Mac had mentioned it to me absolutely ages ago, but there are quite a few titles on the list that are short stories that could be viewed online. She'd mentioned The Yellow Wallpaper and I'd already read it so I didn't really look into any further until last night. I managed to read all three of the Edgar Allen Poe stories on the list (The Purloined Letter, The Pit and the Pendulum, and The Fall of the House of Usher) so if you're interested (like me) that might be something to look into more... Apparently A Modest Proposal by Johnathan Swift is only a few pages long and there are others.)

I'll tell you, these last few days were hell-ish. I really wanted to go to the library and it snowed so I wasn't able until this morning. I hate being stuck indoors, especially when I'm running low on books. Even though I'm only 100 pages into What I Loved and still had another book to read after that (though I know once I start Saffy's Angel it won't take me long to read it), I start to panic a little bit. I get this weird jittery feeling and everything just doesn't feel right. It's amazing what books, or lack of books does to my mental health. Luckily, the roads looked clear this morning. And Elliot is back in pre-school this afternoon.

We did have fun for a little while, in the snow.

ESFP - The Performer

According to Typealyzer, my blog's personality is ESFP.

The entertaining and friendly type. They are especially attuned to pleasure and beauty and like to fill their surroundings with soft fabrics, bright colors and sweet smells. They live in the present moment and don´t like to plan ahead - they are always in risk of exhausting themselves. The enjoy work that makes them able to help other people in a concrete and visible way. They tend to avoid conflicts and rarely initiate confrontation - qualities that can make it hard for them in management positions.

I love this. I love that my writing (apparently) is entertaining and friendly. In real life, I'm very much an introvert. You'd never catch me being a performer. The part about avoid conflict and confrontation? That's me all over the place. Here's a better look at my actual personality: ISFJ.

What personality is does your blog take on? Is it in any way similar to your own personality?

Overheard

Elliot to the family friend/plumber who came over to look at our radiators:

Here is my room! Here is my bed! Here is my teddy! Here is my books and my garage! Here is my wardrobe... here is my curtains! ....

(this carries on for a few minutes, until finally)

Elliot to FF/P:

Here is my toothbrush! And my toothpaste!

At which point, Elliot unscrews the toothpaste lid and shows the poor man his toothpaste and I had to step in and usher Elliot into a different room of the house because, seriously, child? Your toothbrush?

25 Random Things

Good lord, is this all over the place at the moment. (this is copied directly from my Facebook page)

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you. (To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

1. I just downloaded a pdf file for a Harlequin romance, even though they're really not my thing, except I couldn't pass up a free book.

2. Even if it's one I'll probably only skim. Or not read at all.

3. 7 out of the 10 books I read this month were children's books and I've realised that I read about three children's books to every adult book even though if you ask me which are my favourites I'll always say that it's the adult books.

4. I love that it snowed, it's very pretty. But I'm also a little annoyed that everything on my to-do list has been put on hold or pushed until after-snow. (taking Elliot for a haircut, going to the library, visiting the fire station)

5. All this month I've been running. I've loved almost all of it. Especially now that I have my new iPod. It turns out, I like listening to music because it drowns out my inner voice which is constant and neverending. It's overwhelming sometimes.

6. For about a week I really enjoyed not watching as much TV but then Lost and 24 came on, we started catching up on episodes of Ugly Betty we missed, there's a whole season of Friday Night Lights to see, not to mention Brothers and Sisters and ER. I feel like a slave to my sky+ sometimes.

7. I have such a crush on Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights. I'm sad the series isn't continuing.

8. It was such a difficult transition to start my university course. I kept getting confused with the big words that were being used in my textbooks. I had to keep telling myself again and again 'you can do this, you can do this' to get through the first week. A month later, I still find myself confused and a little out of my depth.

9. The tutorials I go to for the course are far away. The thought of driving there most Tuesday nights made me breakdown into a fit of crying over the weekend. Sometimes I can't stand how emotional I am.

10. I'm trying to cut down on my comfort eating. My dad is visiting in March and he asked me if there was anything I wanted from America. I was so tempted to ask for huge bags of all the American sweets that I crave and can't get here. I am so impressed (and horrified) that I only asked for one thing. (mini Tootsie Rolls)

11. I've been feeling nostalgic lately. For holidays we've taken, for high school and the friends I had there, working at Books Etc. If I was honest with myself I'd realise is that what I'm really feeling is lonely.

12. I've been going to toddler groups with Elliot (and now Joshua) for nearly two years and I see mostly the same women there. I know their faces but very few names. I feel like it's too late to introduce myself this late in the game. I thought it'd be different when I started taking Elliot to pre-school. It's worse. Everyone is either stand-offish or clique-ish. It's maddening.

13. We're planning Joshua's first birthday party at the moment. I still think of Joshua as younger than he is. It's a little sad that he's no longer a baby.

14. I love getting packages in the post. I've had two emails this week and a phone call that have made me think that there are possibly three packages coming my way. (weeeeeee) The postman just dropped off a package just this instant. It wasn't for me.

15. I have the doorbell chime set to play 'Oh Susannah' when someone presses the doorbell, but it's rather annoying, so I've switched it to play 'God Save the Queen' because I think it's funny.

16. It's taken me longer than it should to write this list. I feel a little under pressure to make this thing as interesting as some of the other lists I've read. Why do I do this to myself? And how do people just write the first things that come to mind?

17. I'd be farther along on this list if I didn't keep deleting them. So far I've deleted two that are too embarassing and disregarded a few more for being not interesting enough.

18. I'm still deciding whether or not I want to take Elliot to pre-school in this snow. If he goes, I'll be able to sit on the sofa and read my book (Fingersmith by Sarah Waters) but I'll have to change out of my pyjamas.

19. I can't think of a single strong female role model that I've had growing up.

20. I'm glad I didn't have girl children, I'd hate the idea of them having me as a role model. I'd worry every single day about their self-esteem.

21. In over 8 years, my mother in law has never heard me swear. Until last week when I picked her up and was driving her back to my place. I stalled the car and probably said the F word. She told my sister-in-law I've been 'learning four letter words' That makes me laugh. (I swear all the time, people)

22. People think I'm nicer than I am. It's annoyed me a lot over the years but I find sometimes it's easier to go along with people's expectations of me.

23. I doubt I will ever live in the United States again. I feel like me living there was a lifetime ago and I've been living a different, better life since I left.

24. I really want a dog. I've wanted a dog since I moved here, and even though now probably isn't the greatest time to get one with children commitments and my studying, I still want one.

25. I'll be thinking about this list all week thinking of other things I should have added/not written about. I will become obsessed with this list.


I've tagged people on FB but feel free to play along...

Books read in January

1. Princess Diaries - Ten Out of Ten by Meg Cabot
2. A Mercy by Toni Morrison
3. Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson
4. Affinity by Sarah Waters
5. The New York Trilogy by Paul Auster
6. The Tales of Beedle the Bard by JK Rowling
7. Airhead by Meg Cabot
8. Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
9. Ten Things I Hate About Me by Randa Abdel-Fattah
10. Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret by Judy Blume

I've enjoyed reading this month. I enjoy reading every month, but this month felt different somehow, special. Maybe it's other things making me feel great, who knows? but I'm thinking it's because I treasured my reading more. I made special time for it. In the past, I've spent my free time on my blog, or catching up on the sky+ box. This month I didn't watch as much TV as I normally do and I was enjoying that. I wrote more scheduled posts and turned off the computer. I liked spending an hour or two at the end of the day reading a good book. It was relaxing and good for my soul. I'm hoping this will continue. How about you?

Sunday Salon - Taking it easy

Both boys and N are not feeling well. I'm exhuasted running around after them. Today is going to be one of those days where nothing gets done except laying about on the sofa with cartoons on. Maybe I'll get to read snatches of my book here and there. Here's hoping anyway.

I just started Fingersmith by Sarah Waters. I love it. I already know that it's going to be one of those books where I must read it at all times and I'm going to be annoyed whenever I have to put it down. I really, really like it when that happens. I might even stay up really late reading it tonight even though I know I'm going to be punished for that decision in the morning. Some books are worth it.

What's the last book you read that you couldn't put down? That you stayed up all night reading even though you know you'll have to get up at the crack of dawn the next morning?