Toddler groups resumed today. I've been looking forward to it for weeks. Oldest always runs off and plays, Littlest generally sleeps and I get an hour and a half to sit somewhere awkwardly by myself but at least there are no children climbing over me and yelling for me to 'look, mummy, look!' I'm not so great with the small talk, folks. I seem to know everyone who comes to toddler group by face but I never seem to progress past the 'hi/how are you/wow your child has grown/did you have a nice weekend' type of conversations, though I've wanted to in many cases.
This morning, this woman walks straight in and started introducing herself. 'Hi, I'm B, this is my first time here' and asks about children's names and ages and where everyone lives. Even walks out with half the crowd's numbers and has made plans. She has my number, I have hers and we've made a tentative plan to meet up after lunch tomorrow. I was thinking maybe she's just one of those people. You know the sort, one who gets on with everyone, always smiling, always laughing, friends with everyone. But she turned out not to be. When everyone was crowding around during storytime trying to get juice and biscuits for the kids, I turned to look at her and she looked just as uncomfortable and awkward as I do every week. And then it looked like she steeled herself up for it and jumped straight in to see if she could help. But I saw it, she forced herself to do that, it was clearly outside of her comfort zone.
And I was thinking, I'd like to be able to do that. Has anyone read that book, Feal the Fear and Do It Anyway'? I always thought everything you needed to know was in the title, so I never did read it (that and self-help books are so not my thing) but that's what it reminded me of. Maybe there's something to it after all.