Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Confidence, fear and what 2009 might bring*
*and no, I hope it doesn't bring a trip to a police station, you know, in cuffs or anything.
Five years ago I passed the test for my driver's license. Five years ago. And I haven't done anything with it until recently. Off and on since we moved to Wokingham I've tried to be more confident in my abilities and for the last two years I've made excuses and put it off. I was happy enough taking the bus and walking. We live on a hill and even with the struggle it is to push a double buggy up such a steep incline most days didn't stop me from doing more driving. I was always too afraid. To afraid to hold that responsibility.
And I think what 2009 will be all about is having more confidence in my own abilities and letting go of some of my fear. Because I am driving and I feel great about it. I feel silly now that it's taken me this long. Holding onto this fear has been holding me back, it's been holding my boys back. Look at Elliot's face in this picture. The day I drove him to the local police station was the best day ever for him. And I wouldn't have been able to do that without driving. He was able to sit in the police car and watch the flashing blue lights. He's asked me every day since then to go back to the police station to see 'police woman Julie' Next week we might drive to the fire station.. or somewhere else just as cool. Because we can. It's possible.